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Wait a minute, Doc. Ah... Are you telling me you built a time machine... out of a DeLorean?

What is all this whining about 'loving' and 'sharing' and not being whole without a partner? Let me tell you, I don't need anyone. I am quite capable of self-fulfilment.

Tell him the liberator who destroyed my property has re-aligned my paradigm of perception.

I gotta tell you - you're fired!

What does your heart tell you?

Momma always says there's an awful lot you could tell about a person by their shoes. Where they're going. Where they've been. I've worn lots of shoes. I bet if I think about it real hard I could remember my first pair of shoes. Momma said they'd take me anywhere. She said they was my magic shoes.

What if I told you insane was working fifty hours a week in some office for fifty years at the end of which they tell you to piss off; ending up in some retirement village hoping to die before suffering the indignity of trying to make it to the toilet on time? Wouldn't you consider that to be insane?

I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six shots or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?

Anyways, you need people of intelligence on this sort of... mission.. quest.. thing!

This is the story of the three Baudelaire children. Violet loved to invent; her brother, Klaus, loved to read; and their sister, Sunny... she loved to bite. My name is Lemony Snicket and it is my duty to tell you their tale. No one knows the precise cause of the Baudelaire fire, but just like that, the Baudelaire children became the Baudelaire orphans.

Shut up, you American. You Americans, all you do is talk, and talk, and say "let me tell you something" and "I just wanna say." Well, you're dead now, so shut up.

Mr. Gambini, that is a lucid, intelligent, well thought-out objection

What do you mean, "No I won't"? Don't presume to tell me what I will and will not do, you don't know me!

When you tell on someone, you're not only telling on them.

Tell 'em to go out there with all they got and win just one for the Gipper.

Faith is believing when common sense tells you not to.

Shut up, you American! You Americans, all you do is talk, and talk, and say "let me tell you something" and "I just wanna say." Well, you're dead now, so shut up!

If it isn't enough, tell us what you had in mind.

Hate to tell you this buddy, but you have to wear clothes to work. There's a law or something.

You didn't hit the brakes! You didn't tell me to!

I'll tell you where you are if you tell me who you are.

If your granny lives in bingville you better tell her to move cuz the coyotes are coming to burn her house down

My father always began his story by telling me about the summer rendezvous of the mountain men. This is where they met every July after a year of trapping in the Rockies.

Whom can I tell that I should not destroy in the telling.

Get on the blower to British Intelligence and let them know about this.

Can you tell a story? Can you make us laugh? Can you make us cry? Can you make us want to break out in joyous song? Is that more than one thing?

Now tell me, which one of these dogs would you want to have as your wide receiver on your football team?

Psychopath, this guy I tell you he is a total psychopath I do not care how boring a job he does!

Who won what? The asshole award? Let me tell you, it was a tie!

Somebody better tell me something, cause this show is some freaky shit.


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