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I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

You are fearless in a way that I shall never know.

Your eyes are full of hate, forty-one. That's good. Hate keeps a man alive.

All the ways you wish you could be, that's me. I look like you wanna look, I fuck like you wanna fuck, I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I am free in all the ways that you are not.

I know that you are a man of your word, General. I know that you would die for honour, for Rome, for the memory of your ancestors. But as for me? I'm an entertainer.

She told me later, that the second she lifted up her foot and saw him not flapping, she knew he was dead. Is that not the perfect visual image of life and death? A fish flapping on the carpet, and a fish not flapping on the carpet.

I've, uh, vertically integrated myself. You know, diversified and shit, and now I'm into the occasional grand larceny, home invasion... shit like that.

That's it, then? That's the secret, grand adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow. You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum.

Ah, I like that. I like tulip. Tulip is much better than mongoloid.

There's a lot of ugly things in this world, son. I wish I could keep 'em all away from you. That's never possible.

When those German scaffolders turn up tonight, let's all make sure that we have a good night. Agreed? You especially, Oz.

Can you fill that up for me?

Is that your final answer?

If you were waiting for the opportune moment, that was it.

You keep doing that the dog is never going to move!

Bring me that horizon, nanananana really bad eggs, drink up me hearties yo ho!

I hate it when he does that.

But first you have to give up. First, you have to know, not fear, know that someday you are going to die. Until you know that, you are useless.

That old saying, how you always hurt the one you love, well, it works both ways.

Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived. I see all this potential, and I see squandering. God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; slaves with white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off.

That old saying, how you always hurt the one you love, well, it works both ways.

I never met a dame yet that didn't know if she was good-looking or not without being told, and there's some of them that give themselves credit for more than they've got.

I never knew that music like that was possible!

It was amazing [the lesbian kiss that got the world talking]

We have no secrets from our readers. Mr. Thatcher is one of our most devoted readers, Mr. Bernstein. He knows what's wrong with every issue since I've taken charge.

Oh, fuck it, I don't have to talk either, man! See how you like it. Just total fuckin' silence. Two can play at that game, smart guy. We'll just see how you like it. Total silence.

Whenever I despair, I remember that the way of truth and love has always won. There may be tyrants and murderers, and for a time, they may seem invincible, but in the end, they always fail. Think of it: always.

If people see this they'll say 'Oh my God, that is horrible,' and then go on eating their dinners.

Why, you're crazy. Besides that, he's on a cliff where a whole army couldn't get at him.

Greg, a man reaches a certain age when he realizes what's truly important. Do you know what that is?


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